The missionary journey can be a whirlwind of excitement. I quite remember the first time I went on a mission trip, I was so excited I could barely sleep- I thought of the people I would meet, I listened eagerly to all the stories of our leaders who had been on missions- the miraculous healings, the power demonstrations. I was pumped with excitement.
All the beautiful images I had painted in my head began to fade away within the first few days of arriving on the field when reality set in. The difficulties encountered on the mission field was not something I bargained for. Long hours of walking on dusty roads to preach the gospel to people who were not prepared to listen, sleeping on the floor in a poorly ventilated room. The worst part for me was carrying buckets of water on my head; my bucket was always empty – I was a Daddy’s girl. I was used to the water running from the taps and finer things in life.
I yearned for home, I withdrew from the rest of the team. I wondered if it was all worth it? would the people accept Christ? would they attend the crusades? Feelings of loneliness crept in.
Well, I never learnt how to carry water on my head, but I left the missions field with very valuable lessons.
Anybody who has spent time on a missions field would possibly identify with the feeling of loneliness and hopelessness which I had to contend with. Loneliness and depression are issues rarely discussed in the missionary community.
Missionaries are expected to be game-changers, bold, courageous, ever ready to rightly divide the word of God and cast out devils. How can the carriers of hope for a lost world feel lonely and depressed when so many are looking up to them for support and hope? But sadly, a lot of missionaries battle with these feelings of loneliness and depression.
Feelings of loneliness are very real amongst missionaries. Even Jesus had His moments of loneliness when He wanted to give up and He put in a request to be relieved of his duties. Without the knowledge of the flock( his disciples ), Jesus sent a letter(the prayer in Gethsemane) to the headquarters(the Father), asking to be relieved of His duties.
The prayer which Jesus prayed in the garden – #Father if it is thy will take this cup from me# was not the prayer of a happy man filled with excitement, it was the prayer of a man who was burdened, tired and lonely; it was the prayer of a man who was ready to give up.
But Jesus did not succumb to those feelings of loneliness by allowing them to become His reality. The same is true for every missionary, those feelings of loneliness and depression should not be your reality. Your reality is that you are not alone. Jesus told His disciples that He would be with them till the end( Matt 28:20). Jesus is with you and so are many others, cheering you on. Heb 12:22-24, tells us that we are surrounded by the Spirit of just men made perfect, an innumerable company of angels, the general assembly and the church of the firstborn.
Jesus’s experience in the garden of Gethsemane teaches us the importance of prayer in dealing with these low moments. Jesus did not hide His feeling, He took it to the Lord in prayer. As he prayed, scripture makes us understand that angels came to comfort and strengthen Him ( Luke 22:43). Take your low moments, loneliness, depression etc to the Lord in prayer. Understand, that you do not have to fight these battles alone- The Lord is with you.
In my personal experience, I find that praying in the language of the Spirit lifts my spirit whenever I have felt depressed. It brings the presence of the Lord into my environment and with the Lord’s presence comes joy ( Ps 16:11). Praying in the Spirit allows God’s grace to become my strength so that I do not have to fight these battles by myself.
Praying in the Spirit allows the Holy Spirit to take over my mind and fill it with peace. I encourage you, whenever those feelings of depression and loneliness set in, invite the Holy Spirit into the battle by praying in the spirit and declaring the word of the Lord over your mind, your soul and your spirit. God has graciously given us His Holy Spirit to be our comforter and our guide. In moments when we feel alone, we need to draw near to Him and allow Him to comfort us and be our strength.
Let me end on this note- feelings of loneliness thrive when we remain in isolation. Notice that Jesus eventually came out of his place of isolation to commune with his disciples and to continue with the assignment. We must follow Jesus example. Whenever you start feeling depressed etc, don’t isolate yourself for long periods, come out and talk to people you can trust. The sense of community and having people around you can lift that burden of loneliness.
Written by: Adjoa Ago
